How to Drive a Woman to Ecstasy

Assuming you have found your ideal woman – or at least a woman who will do until that one comes along – it’s time you learned how to make love to her so capably that your mutual satisfaction, your outright ecstasy, in bed is assured.

Half of sex is simply ‘you’ – your personality, your ethics, your attitudes toward women and your body. The other half, the half without which all this personality and involvement mean nothing, is your sexual skill. We can break the notion of ‘skill’ down still further into the following elements:

1. Sexual knowledge – awareness of where a woman’s body is most responsive; and what techniques and positions may be employed to elicit that response.

2. Physical ability – the capability of using your body and employing these myriad techniques to achieve mutual fulfillment, woman satisfaction, and mutual pleasure in bed.

Combine the two skilfully,  and you will discover how to please a woman successfully.

Women’s Erogenous Zones

Most men think there are two areas of a woman’s body that are sexually responsive – the breasts and the vagina. 

But in truth, practically every square inch of the woman’s body has the ability to become fully erotic, and no man can consider himself a great lover until he has learned to explore and take (and give) pleasure during sex in all of his woman’s sexual potential.

To accomplish this, there are two techniques you must master: the dexterous use of your hands, and the kiss. Now let’s take a look at your girl’s body.

Sexual pleasure is a combination of sensitivity and subtlety and wild passion. It’s the two things in combination that provide mutual pleasuring in bed.


The mouth is the most beautiful, the most sensitive, the most active organ you can reach while she’s still dressed. The kiss is probably the single most important move toward the bedroom. It’s the key! It turns her on – or off – and, since life is a lot better when you turn her on, you can hardly do too much homework in this lesson of love.

  • Don’t crush her lips against her teeth to show your passion.
  • Don’t squeeze the breath out of her as you’re kissing her.
  • Don’t try to ram your tongue down her throat in order to stimulate her.
  • Don’t bite her lips.
  • Don’t use a dry, birdlike, pecking kiss with no pressure at all.
  • Don’t kiss with your mouth wide open and slobber all over her.
  • Don’t drool as you kiss her.
  • Don’t hold a kiss so long she can’t breathe.
  • Don’t, don’t, don’t have bad breath.

Do cushion your lips against hers rather than pressing. This will keep your front teeth covered and avoid any initial hard contact which may offend her.

Do let your tongue just touch the area inside her lips as you brush across them, but don’t penetrate beyond her teeth at this point.

Do begin raising her sexual temperature with sensitive, probing kisses, then

Do proceed more boldly once you have established that she is enjoying your kisses.

Do let your tongue slip between her teeth until you touch her tongue. Withdraw and see if she follows you. Repeat this tactic until she is following your tongue as quickly as you are inserting and withdrawing it.

Do switch occasionally to nipping (not biting) her lower lip and sucking it in slightly between your lips. Vary the area coverage … kiss her ear lobes again … her eyes … her neck. (I particularly like the pulsating spot where the ear, the neck, and the jawline all come together.)

Do keep your tongue narrow and pointed, not broad and flat. Your tongue is larger than hers, and filling up her mouth with it may give her a panicky feeling.

Do notice any shyness about, or rejection of, your soul kiss. If there is, retreat from penetrating so deeply into her mouth. Start again slowly until you feel she is accepting and welcoming your tongue action once more.

Do kiss her again and again and again and again. Kissing is the first beautiful, intimate contact between a man and a woman, a preliminary quickening of each other’s senses and sensuality.


From the beginning of time, men have looked at, measured, painted, sculpted, photographed, and worshipped women’s breasts. Men suck them from the day we are born, and are drawn to them for the rest of their lives. Breasts are beautiful, and men never let women forget it. 

But women are as hung up about the size and shape of their breasts as men are about their cocks. Unlike penises, however, women’s breast sensations can vary. Some breasts seem to offer little sensation, while some are so responsive that stimulation can create clitoral orgasms. 

Despite these massive individual differences, women are unanimous on one point: They don’t like their breasts being handled roughly. It seems that a depressing number of men are breast grabbers, squeezers, and biters. These are the men who are never going to know how to please a woman in bed, nor how to satisfy her.

Video – Breasts

Women have as much fear of being injured in the breasts as you have of being kicked in the balls, so use your head and proceed gently and slowly when you do your breast work.

One of the most effective methods of pleasuring the woman is to stroke the breasts in a soothing manner, brushing your hands and fingers softly and slowly over the nipples. Then cup one nipple in the palm of your hand and move the hand in a lazy, clockwise motion, round and round, until the friction creates the beginning of nipple erection.

Now you can commence fondling the breasts more firmly while you maneuver a nipple between your lips. Alternate kneading and licking actions on one breast while you are titillating the other nipple with your thumb and index finger. This is sure to give her pleasure. Kiss and suck, kiss and suck the nipples, run the tongue around the entire nipple area including the areola (the dark area around the nipple).

Hold both breasts in your hands, bring the nipples together, and run your tongue across them in a rapid, flicking motion. Your hands should be gentle, your mouth soft, and your tongue a wildly darting stimulant to these most prized and delicious erogenous zones. If you want to know how to please a woman, this is a great way to start!

Special care should be taken during and before menstruation, when a woman’s breasts are slightly enlarged and more likely to be ultrasensitive to strong stroking or sucking. Some women’s breasts are so tender at this time of the month that they can’t stand caressing at all.

To be sure that you don’t cause her discomfort that she’s too polite to express to you, ask her directly some night about what times of the month her breasts are most capable of sexual sensation, if they hurt during menstruation, and for how long.

There are times, during the height of sexual pleasure particularly, when you can handle her breasts a bit more firmly. Not roughly – firmly.

Slightly pinching the nipples at this point can be a welcome and lusty sexual by-play, but use good common sense. While a slight momentary pinch can be joyous, too much pressure will hurt her and detract from her pleasure and the overall love-making mood.


The man who knows how to caress a woman’s clitoris will never lack ardent bedmates. He is capable of providing the greatest pleasure. You can’t consider yourself a good lover until you can wring orgasms from her clitoris with the artistry that a great violinist displays in extracting exquisite music from his violin. This is indeed the best way to pleasure a woman.

The clitoris is the woman equivalent of the penis. It comes in different sizes, becomes erect when sexually stimulated, and is the source of most women’s orgasms.

Unlike the penis, however, the clitoris often retracts and even seems to disappear during the plateau and orgasmic phases (imagine, if you can, your penis reversing itself and being swallowed up by your body), it usually responds more slowly to sexual stimulation, and has a much, much lower pain threshold than your cock.

Judging from what women have said, the deplorable truth is that a great many men don’t know how to caress the clitoris to give a woman pleasure. Here are some mistakes:

  • Don’t employ direct manipulation on the clitoris in the early stages.
  • Don’t stop exciting her manually (or orally) if you lose contact with the clitoris.
  • Don’t stop stimulation at the point of orgasm.
  • Don’t use the same tactile stimulation pattern for any length of time.
  • Don’t assume that she is ‘all through’ after having just one orgasm. She may require more orgasm than one to satisfy her sexually in bed.

Being guilty of even one of these don’ts is robbing her of sexual pleasure. If you’re guilty of all of them, you might well be robbed of your sexual pleasure, too….

If you’re trying to please a woman in bed, always begin with indirect manipulation of the clitoris.

Caress the mons area first and then move on, after she is obviously responding, to the right and then the left side of the clitoral shaft and then back again to the mons area. It’s vital to vary your technique, as concentration on one area with a single technique can cause numbness, and nothing is more disheartening than a numb clitoris.

Avoid direct stimulation of the tip of the clitoris until just before her orgasm, and be sparing and gentle to avoid the possibility of causing pain. Some women can’t stand direct contact even then, so check this out thoroughly with her before leaping in with heavy fingers.

Make sure that the clitoris remains lubricated by using (1) the juices from her vagina, (2) my saliva, or (3) an artificial lube. If you don’t keep her clitoris moist, those pleasurable sensations you’re creating will quickly turn to pain.

One of the dumbest mistakes men make is to stop manipulation when the woman reaches orgasm. To please a woman and give her the greatest fulfillment and pleasure, you must satisfy her desire and need for continued stimulation during orgasm, so keep those fingers busy.

Many a man has had the experience of lying there, happily exciting her clitoris, then suddenly finding himself unable to find it. Oddly, this means you are really pleasing her!

Don’t start feeling around for it, just keep on manipulating the mons area and clitoral shaft and she will continue to respond and will reach orgasm shortly thereafter.

Retraction of the clitoris during advanced excitation is normal, and your failure to continue stimulation will create strong frustration in the highly excited woman and cause her to lose her orgasmic ability temporarily – something that will not exactly endear you to her.

After she has had her orgasm, wait a minute or two (as the clitoris will be extremely sensitive to the touch immediately after climax) and then you may bring her to orgasm again. Most women need either one big orgasm or a series of smaller ones before they are satisfied.

But don’t worry. After you’ve warmed her up with the first orgasm, the others can be attained relatively quickly.


The vagina. Yes, it’s the altar at which men worship. From the day we come out of it, we connive, cajole, compliment, and buy our way back in. Men have lost fortunes, kings have abdicated, brothers have betrayed brothers, and governments have toppled – all because of this little cavern of joy.

For a woman to get great pleasure during sex, and emotional and sexual fulfillment, when you enter a woman she feels possessed – a necessary factor to her sexual well-being.

Physically, it is here that she receives the man. It is also here that the man has an unfailing clue to how effectively he has been able to arouse her, for the woman achieves lubrication within ten to thirty seconds after you have initiated effective sexual stimulation.

Until your woman has become moist and juicy, you cannot enter her. And as the woman becomes more excited, the inner two-thirds of the vagina lengthens and becomes distended – ready to accept any size penis she’s likely to encounter. This may be the secret to knowing how to please a woman – your girlfriend, wife of partner.

To test for lubrication, insert one or two fingers in the vagina. If she is wet inside, you may congratulate yourself on knowing how to please a woman. And you can pleasure her further by simulating the in-and-out motion of the penis with your fingers. Pay particular attention to the upper part of the vagina near the entrance, so you can indirectly stimulate the clitoris as well.